Monday, November 24, 2008


**WARNING: Rant ahead.  Skip to avoid the verbally-violent ramblings of a righteously-indignant woman.**

I have an incredibly low tolerance for adulterers.  You can reference my McCain post to see a glimpse of my wrathful hate towards cheating scumbags.  IMHO, the vows uttered on the altar are sacred and binding, regardless of one's religious leanings.  The words spoken represent an oath and a commitment that lasts forever, and should not be broken in any way, shape, or form until death separates the spouses.  Though I suppose this sentiment is oft-associated with marriage and divorce, I believe it applies equally to monogamy.  Unless one's pledged vows are, "I will love and honour and cherish you and be faithful to you only until things get uncomfortable or tough or boring," or "I will love and honour and cherish you and also some other people, and be sort of faithful to you, excluding a few other people that I might chance upon and be sexually attracted to," one is both legally and morally bound to remain monogamous to their spouse, as per the binding oral contract they've pledged to them.

My sudden wrath was awakend by yesterday's headlines concerning Gordon Ramsay, of Hell's Kitchen and potty-mouthed fame.  If the News of the World is to be believed, then Ramsay is the biggest douche-bag ever, even beating out John McCain who left his disfigured wife for an heiress.

(Disclaimer - Although I realize that NoTW isn't exactly the most reputable source, and journalistic integrity is debatably lacking in their articles, more often than not, scandalous reports of this nature are not so out-to-lunch as one might think.  The British tabloids are far better able to sniff out truthful stories than their U.S. counterparts, and I believe that this is an example of such.)

So it seems that good ol' groping Gordy had a hard time keeping it in his pants....for seven years. This means that for more than half of his married life (which is 12 years), he has allegedly been sleeping with a "professional mistress" on the side.  She, a supposedly-reformed married-man-dating homewrecker, has opportunistically profitted from her shameless pursuits by writing books and columns about mistressing, and by offering "counseling" to other ho-bags who are dating married guys.  She (whose name deserves no mention on this blog) has previously claimed to be "reformed" from her home-wrecking ways, though NoTW seems to suggest otherwise.  Apparently, Gordon the Git and this slut (and I do not use this term lightly, being fully aware of the many connotations associated with the word) enjoyed a tryst only a few days ago.

As I've read about his supposed philandering, I cannot help but feel incredibly sorry for his wife Tana, who has shown a united front with the cheating cad by publicly standing with him in photo opps yesterday.  Of course, no comment of denial has been issued by either Rat-Bastard Ramsay or his publicist, and Tana has also refused to comment on the allegations.  To me, the lack of denial speaks volumes to the truthfulness of these claims.  If one is truly innocent, why would one not immediately leap to their own defense with both a vehement denial and equally-immediate legal action?  To avoid addressing it at all is to me a tacit confession of guilt.

It offends me even more that the "brand" that this two-timing wanker has been trying to pawn off in books and on TV is that of a loyal, loving family-man.  On numerous occassions in interviews, recreant Ramsay has boasted of his fidelity and attraction to his wife alone, and alluded to their supposedly-active sex life.  Evidently, this lying loser failed to mention that he also found a certain skank equally attractive for the better part of his marriage.  

Though I realize that many justify affairs by rationalizing that something must be inherently wrong in the marital relationship beforehand, driving a spouse to "meet their needs" elsewhere, I would argue that the state of the marriage is irrelevant.  Sure, maybe there isn't enough love or affirmation or ego-stroking.  Maybe spats are everyday occurrences, and communication has broken down.  This does not alter the basic truth that both spouses stood before family, friends, and God (or whatever they believe in) and made an oral contract with one another promising unending love, respect, and faithfulness, until death parts one of them.  Ramsay the jerk-off is not yet dead.  Nor is his wife.  Therefore, if he has slept with someone other than his wife, he has violated his contract and broken his vows.  He has dishonoured Tana, disrespected her, and even if he loves her, he has shown her a contempt that borders on being a hate crime.  He has violated her trust, and been an unfaithful partner.  
I am sure some might also want to blame the hussy that has made a career out of ruining marriages and sleeping with married men.  I'm with you on that, but don't even get me started on the whores or scumbags that get involved with married folks.  That is a whole other post unto itself ;)  The point is, the responsibility for faithfulness rests with the one who is married and who has pledged the marriage vows.  Regardless of the evil seductive nature of the harlots and manwhores who tempt a spouse, the choice to cheat or to stay faithful is ultimately made by the one with the ring and the life partner.  Period.

So what is to become of the Ramsays, I do not yet know.  The next few days will likely reveal more sordid details, and I would imagine that a "refusal to dignify ridiculous claims with a response" will follow.  There will be a bunch of public outings undertaken by Tana and that sleazebag she's married to, and together they will likely attempt a weathering of the storm, even as their marriage falls apart behind closed doors.  The floozy will either release proof of the affair or deny it on several media outlets to extend her 15-minutes, and then she will either launch a career in reality TV or write a tell-all, or get paid for her silence (all the while still profiting from these allegations).  Once an opportunisitic b*tch, always one.

Either way, I'm done with Gordon Ramsay and his TV shows and his cookbooks.  Hubbs & I had been enjoying the Kitchen Nightmare series and had even contemplated picking up a recipe book authored by this scoundrel.  No longer.  Even if Tana takes him back, this conscience-less creep is dead to me.


Natalie said...

That is bad news. Luckily, I haven't ever been much of a fan. What a douche. Pardon my language.

~Rain``` said...

I can understand your righteous anger. Infidelity grieves me as well, especially when it happens in the church. A few of my friends have experienced hell due to their spouse's sexual escapades outside their marriage. Not only did the act damage the marriage relationship, but the relationship of so many other people connected to the couples. Sad. We need to be proactive in guarding and protecting our marriages.

tejanamama said...

sad for sure. it is all too common unfortunately. And for those now sure or somewhat tentative about having an affair or who had perhaps not really had the 'bravery' to pull it off, there are services like these:

WHICH MAKE ME WANT TO GAG!!!! They are running ads on tv now!!! I CANNOT BELIEVE stations are allowing it?? I almost threw up when i saw the story on cnn regarding this service and how it was starting to advertise on television! It is SOOOOOO sad!! :(

Mrs. Loquacious said...

Natalie - "douche" is not a strong enough term, so no offense taken ;)

Rain - I agree; the selfishness of one oft results in the hurt of many. We're also very proactive in protecting our marriage; Hubbs and I guard our relationship very carefully. :)

Tejanamama - Yeah, that trollop that cheated with Ramsay works for Ashley Madison. I didn't know they ran ads on TV though; that's just plain sick and disturbed. It is also another reason why I warn Hubbs that many women cannot be trusted ;) I think these b*tches who work for such companies are going to be in for rude awakenings come the day of judgment!

Curlz said...

Wow! I'm sensing some pent up hostility,...but that could just be me ;). Therapist is definately in the "no" category for you career-wise, I'm afraid. I mean, I would hate to see you rip out the wind pipe of some poor sap blubbering on your "couch" due to a recent infidelity. By this, "death do us part", I take it you don't believe there is ever cause for divorce other than adultery? Even as a christian adulterer, I agree wholeheartedly that there is no excuse for adultery. One should end said relationship, before entering into another. However, and I fear this may fall upon deaf ears, there are people out there that have real psychological issues that cause them to cheat - just as the sociopath kills, the pathological liar lies, the molester molests, the clepto' steals. I'm not talking about rendering excuses for deviant behavior, merely offering Christlike compassion for the dysfunctional. By the way, I could offer up an equally and even far more hostile rant when it comes to those who hurt children, so I am certainly not speaking from my high horse, simply offering "another side". ~ Curlz

Mrs. Loquacious said...

Curlz - LOL! Therapist would have been in my career path at one point in time; did I tell you I once worked as a psych assistant co-facilitating support groups for sex offenders on parole? Yep, I did...and for a full year I did so, whilst reading files upon files of their heinous deeds. So I can pull the empathy out when I need to, but infidelity for the most part is a choice, and a selfish one at that.

There are other reasons for divorce that are valid, such as abuse and godlessness on the part of one spouse (vs. another who has come to know Christ after being married), and fraudulent claims prior to marriage. I don't think that marriage is a relationship that should be entered into lightly, however, and I believe that once one is committed, one must try their very hardest to make it work.

If certain serial cheaters have some psychological condition that renders them incapable of fidelity, then they absolutely could benefit from counseling. However, does that excuse their unfaithfulness? The dysfunctional tendencies may exist, but the choice to act upon these compulsions is entirely conscious. It is the action, and the action in multiple instances, that I take offense to. Like the temptation to sin, there is no judgment on being tempted; it is a natural part of human existence and for some, a particularly sharp thorn in the flesh. There is, however, judgment connected with acting on the temptation, and subsequently sinning.

Ramsay the rat is an example of someone whom I doubt has any psychological condition that causes him to cheat, though in his arrogant desire for self-preservation and face-saving, he might choose to use that as an excuse. He cheats because he can, and he obviously likes the power and the kinkiness of being unfaithful to his wife with some hussy. I truly believe he has a conscience that has convicted him of his wrongdoing, but he has chosen to ignore those feelings and offend multiple times over because he is a narcissistic, self-centered ass. So in this case, my wrath is poured out in full with little sympathy or compassion for him. Instead, my heart and my compassion go out to his wife, and his children.

Anonymous said...

Wow...I thought Christians were supposed to have compassion for other people? I'm not necessarily excusing Gordon Ramsay for what he did. But I do take some offence to the comment that people who get involved with married/involved people as 'whores and scumbags' and calling his mistress a 'slut'. People have complex histories and do things out of pain, habit, etc. That's not to say that we don't make choices, but sometimes you just do the best you can, even if it means getting involved with a married, doing drugs, being promiscuous. Not to mention the fact that we really don't know what went on in their marriage, only what we have read in the media. Who knows how virtuous his wife is.

Personally, as someone who has done questionable things in the past, I know that the choices I made never came from a place of pure evil, but from a more innocent place inside myself. And when I read about stories of cheating, I do feel bad for the person who was cheated on, but unless I know the cheater is made of pure evil through and through, I'm willing to have some compassion for them because who knows what their backstory is.

Justice~! said...

Anonymous writes:

"sometimes you just do the best you can, even if it means getting involved with a married"

Nah, I can safely say that getting involved with a married person is definitely not the best one can do!

I can have compassion for people having complicated backstories but a complicated backstory is not an excuse for a morally weak decision.

As for the Christian aspect, when David committed adultery with Bathsheba:

* did the Lord say, "No worries, David, I totally understand, after all, you have a complex past"
* did David say, "This is no big deal, after all, look at all the history I've been through in my life?"

or did they both demonstrate a completely *different* attitude towards that sin?

I'll leave this as an exercise to the discerning reader to figure out